A Turning Point
by maggienhawk
Summary: A phone call proves to be a turning point in Sara’s life. GSR. WIP
1. Chapter 1

**Title: A Turning Point**

**Author: Maggienhawk**

**Disclaimer: TPTB were supposed to come over today so that I could sign the paperwork, making CSI mine. However, the blizzard prevented them from coming and they are still not mine.**

**Summary: A phone call proves to be a turning point in Sara's life. GSR. WIP**

**A/N: I swore I would never do a WIP again, seeing as I haven't finished (and probably won't) my last one. However, this idea has been in my head for months, and pretty much works anywhere in the series. And you'll probably see another chapter or two out of me during the next two days because I'm snowed in due to the blizzard that just hit New England. Ugh…I hate winter. But, I digress.**

"Okay people, we've got two DB's tonight. Sofia, you and Greg have a suspicious circs in Henderson. Sara, you and I have a…"

The shrill ring of a cell phone interrupted Grissom, and each member rushed to check their own. After two rings, Sara spoke up, "It's mine." She read the display, and not recognizing the number, she informed Grissom that she would take in the hallway, and walked out of the room.

After watching Sara leave, Grissom's attention was brought back to the two other members of the shift as Greg asked for the assignment sheet. "See ya later, Boss," he threw over his shoulder as he and Sofia made their way out of the room.

Grissom decided to give Sara a few minutes to take her call, and sat down at the table to finish his cup of coffee. Five minutes turned into ten, and he began to get agitated that she was taking too long on the phone. He stood up and walked into the hallway, looking left and then right, and not seeing Sara either way. But he did notice that his office door was shut. 'I don't remember shutting that earlier,' he thought and started making his way down the hall. He opened the door to his office to find Sara sitting in one of the chairs across from his desk, elbows on her knees, her hands covering her face. However, it was eerily silent in the room.

He walked up to her slowly, and lightly touched her shoulder to get her attention. She jumped, and swung around to see who dared to invade her privacy. Her distraught eyes met concerned blue ones, and she relaxed once she realized that Grissom had come looking for her.

"What's wrong, Sara?" he asked softly, pulling the other chair closer and sitting down, his hand never leaving her arm.

"I just needed to come in here for some privacy."

He narrowed his eyes in confusion because she hadn't answered his question. "What happened? Who was on the phone?"

Sara tore her gaze away from his and looked down at his hand that had migrated to her own. "It was St. Luke's Hospital in San Francisco. My brother was in an accident. I'm listed as his next of kin."

"Is everything okay?"

She could feel the tears building up, and her free hand came up and rubbed her eyes to prevent them from falling. "They're not sure if he's going to make it through the night. I have to get out there as soon as I can."

As she finished speaking, the tears started falling, and two strong arms wrapped around her. She leaned into his chest and cried for a few minutes, but almost as quickly as her outburst began, she stopped and pulled back.

Grissom was startled by her quick transition, and just merely watched her as she jumped out of the chair and began to make her way out of the room. Once he realized what she was doing, though, he reached out and gently grabbed her arm, stopping her from leaving his office.

She turned around to face him, "What? I have to get going, Grissom. I don't have time for this."

"Look, I just wanted you to know that I'm here for you, as a friend. Call me if you need anything, okay? I'm serious, anything."

She visibly relaxed in his grip, and allowed a small, genuine smile to form on her lips. "Thank you. You'll be the first person I call when I know anything, I promise."

She turned to leave the room, calmer than she would have a minute ago; thinking all the way from the locker room to her car that there was no way that she could break that one promise. Because Grissom would soon be the only person in her life she could share anything with.

For once in her life, the silence in the car didn't annoy her. Ever since she had her first car, there always had to be music playing, especially on long trips. Too many things would begin to assault her mind: memories, feelings, thoughts. It was always better to have a distraction like music in the car, or else she would eventually have to pull over, let out a good cry, relax and get back on the road. Today, however, she wouldn't even dream of turning on the radio. She needed to think, knowing she was basically driving to California to say good-bye to her big brother.

She kept remembering the phone call, the scenes in her head replaying over and over again, and she struggled to keep from crying.

_"Sidle."_

_ "Is this Sara Sidle"_

_ "Yes, may I ask who this is?"_

_ "My name is Mary, and I'm a nurse at St. Luke's Hospital in __San Francisco__. Are you Erich Sidle's sister?"_

_ Sara swallowed reflexively, and out of the corner of her eye she saw Greg and Sofia make their way out of the break room. She needed to get somewhere private, and quick. She already feared the worst, and tears began to form in her eyes, as she made her way down the hall. "Yes," her voice cracked a bit, "Is something wrong? Is he okay?"_

_ She spotted Grissom's open office and practically ran down the hall towards it, slamming the door behind her. She collapsed in a chair as the nurse on the phone relayed the status of her brother's condition. "Mr. Sidle was involved in a traffic accident, and while the doctor has been able to stabilize him for the moment, he is in critical condition and the doctor is not exactly confident that he will survive the night."_

_ Sara let out a breath that she didn't know she was holding. "Oh my God."_

_ The nurse continued, "I know that this is not exactly the way you would like to find out, but you are listed as the next of kin, and he has asked, during one of his moments of consciousness, that we contact you, and let you know that he wants you there."_

_ She was still reeling from the initial shock of the phone call. "Okay. I'll be there. Thank you." _

_ As the nurse began to finish the phone call, Sara remembered something important. "Wait!"_

_ "Yes?"_

_ "You said my brother was in a car accident, but what about his family, his wife and daughter? Were they with him? Are they okay?"_

_ "Calm down, Miss Sidle. I really do not know who else was in the car with him, and even if I did, I am unable to release that information unless you are listed as their next of kin. I really am sorry that I can't help you regarding his family."_

_ "It's okay, I understand. I'll be there as soon as I can." She hung up the phone without waiting for a salutation from the nurse. Replacing her phone on her belt, she was too shocked to cry, and just needed a few moments to gather her thoughts before leaving._

She gripped the steering wheel tightly, and pressed the accelerator a little bit harder. She needed to get there, just so that she would stop wondering what happened to Julie and Amy, if they were alright. She turned on the radio, and hoped that the images in her head would disappear.

TBC


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: After spending more than an hour digging my car out of 2 feet of snow with a stupid children's shovel, I'm tired and decided to write. My goal is to have this finished by the next new episode, because it will deal with Sara's backstory, and I don't want to write a different story after the fact. We'll see how well that works out, but bear with me and please let me know what you think. Reviews really do make me want to write more. **

Walking through the sterile walls of the hospital, Sara felt unusually relaxed. For some reason, hospitals had never bothered Sara. They were a place that could heal, offer comfort, and offer protection from the outside world. At least that's how she felt until Pamela Adler entered her life, just lying on the hospital bed, being completely brain dead, but still living in every possible way. But that was just one memory out of many regarding hospitals and it wasn't the one that was flashing through her head as she made her way to her brother's room.

_A thirteen year old Sara woke up in a white room, tubes running from her arms to the bags of clear saline next to the bed. A nurse was changing a bandage on her forehead. "Why am in the hospital?"_

_"You were in an accident, honey, but you'll be alright."_

_"Where's my mom?"_

_"She's down the hall, but let's not have you worrying about her right now, okay?"_

_She could feel herself drifting away, "Okay."_

Down the hall she recognized Julie's mother, Angie, and slowed her determined pace to a slow stride. Angie was sitting stiffly, as if she was trying to hide her grief from everyone around her, but Sara could see she was hurting. Curled up into Angie's side was a little blonde head that Sara easily recognized as a sleeping Amy. She let out a long sigh of relief seeing her niece was alright. Angie looked up when she heard the sigh, and gave Sara a very small, very forced smile.

After greeting each other softly, Sara sat down next to Angie, keeping Amy between them. She asked quietly, "What happened?"

"Erich and Julie were driving back from dinner, coming by my place to pick up Amy, and someone plowed right through a red light, slamming into Julie's side of the car."

"How is…"

"She never made it to the hospital."

Sara reached over and placed her arm lightly across Angie's back, rubbing her shoulder blades lightly. She watched as tears fell down Angie's cheeks, and allowed her the time to grieve; knowing that she probably hadn't had the chance because she wanted to stay strong for her granddaughter.

Amy. Sara looked down to her niece, and brushed a piece of hair that had fallen down in her face, behind her ear. The little girl would soon be living without both parents, and the dream that Erich had, the dream of keeping the family together always, would be shattered.

When Angie had composed herself, she turned to face the woman she would always feel was like a second daughter. "Your brother has been waiting for you. He's goddamned determined to see you, and won't stop asking the doctor's when you'll be here."

A small, knowing smirk made its way to Sara's lips. "That sure does sound like Erich." She stood up, and after looking to Angie for direction, she walked slowly into her brother's room. She gasped when she saw the pale form on the bed in front of her. He had always seemed so strong to her, and she knew that this was the one time in her life that he was going to be looking to her for strength, not the other way around.

"Sara? Is that you?"

She smiled, "Of course it's me."

"Finally," he tried to sigh exasperatedly, but it ended up sounding like a sigh of pain.

"Hey, now, you know there are no flights out of Vegas after midnight. I had to drive my ass out here to see you," she joked, knowing it would help lessen the tension already present within the walls of the room. She sat down in the chair next to his bed, and reached out for his hand.

"And I'm glad you did. I wanted to ask you something in person." He stopped to catch his breath. "Julie and I, we had barely talked about it, thinking that wouldn't ever have to deal with it."

"Erich, what are you talking about?"

"Amy. We discussed asking you to care for her in the event of our deaths, but we never got around to it. Angie's health is deteriorating, and can't take care of a three year old like Amy. You're her only other living relative that I would consider, Sara."

She huffed out a tiny, unsure laugh, and ran her free hand through her hair. "You want me to be Amy's guardian?"

"You sell yourself short sometimes, you know that?" He smiled as much as he could as she nodded her head slightly, knowing he was right. "You are perfectly capable of caring for a child. I know you are, and Amy adores you."

"Does Angie know?" She really didn't want to step on any toes, or start a long chain of custody battles with the one woman she considered to be a second mother.

"I just talked with her a few hours ago, and she agrees. Sara, you can do this, I know you can, and I need you to. I need you to be strong for Amy."

"But Erich, I was never the strong one."

"Bullshit!" he yelled, but the outburst caused a sharp twinge of pain in his chest, and his face contorted into a grimace. She stood to get a doctor, but he wouldn't let go of her hand. She turned back to face him, and he was shaking his head. "No, I'm fine. Just a little sharp pain. It'll pass in a second."

She nodded and sat back down as his breathing slowed down, and she could see beads of sweat that had built up due to his strain. She reached for a towel on the bedside table, and wiped his brow with it, and he started speaking again.

"Sara, I know that when you're around me, you feel like you still need protecting. But you don't, you've moved on with your life. We both know you've been through some rough stuff in the past, but look at you. You're so strong and independent. You made it, when so many of the kids you lived with didn't stand a chance. And I know you're sitting there thinking that the only reason you made it was because I was there. It may be true, but now I need for you to do the same with Amy. I want her to grow up and be just like you, Sara. Strong, smart, and able to think on her own. You can help her become someone like that."

The tears that had built up in her eyes finally fell. "I'll do it. For you, I'll can do it."

"Thank you."

She nodded, and wiped the tears from her cheeks, diverting her gaze to the room around her. It was the first time in a long time that she had walked into a room and not observed the surroundings. This time though, it didn't matter and she turned her attention back to her brother when she felt him squeeze her hand.

"Can you bring Amy in here? I think its time to say good bye."


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: Yeah, so I know I said I wanted this done by Nesting Dolls…obviously that didn't happen. Who knew real life could be such a bitch. Anyways, I can fit this story to work post-ND, I hadn't really gotten into the backstory I was going to use. This chapter is short, but I wanted it to end there. I am going right now to start working on Chapter 4, so hopefully I'll have another update later tonight. Enjoy!**

Wiping the tears from her eyes, the tears she didn't want her brother to see, Sara walked back into the hall where she had left Angie and Amy. Despite her despair, she involuntarily smiled when she saw that her niece was wide awake and talking quietly with her grandmother. Sara just stood outside her brother's door and watched Amy play with the hem of her skirt nervously, while Angie spoke with her. The reality of the situation hit her at that moment. 'This little girl is my responsibility now.' To say the least, she was scared senseless.

At that moment, however, she heard a high pitched squeal, and within seconds Amy had her arms locked around Sara's legs. All she could do was laugh, "Hey there, Sweetie. How are you doing?"

The little girl smiled as Sara reached down and picked her up, pulling her into a huge bear hug. She mumbled against Sara's neck, "I'm doing good, Aunt Sara. I miss you all the time."

"Oh, I know, honey, I miss you all the time too." She dislodged the arms from around her neck, and pulled Amy back to look at her better. Brushing a piece of hair out of her face, Sara spoke softly, "Daddy wants to talk to you, okay? You ready to see him?"

The little girl nodded her head just the slightest bit, eyes sparkling because she wanted to see her father. It broke Sara's heart to know that Amy never got the chance to say good bye to her mother, and now had no idea this would be the last time she would speak to her father. They made their way quietly into the room, Sara hugging Amy tightly.

Erich heard the footsteps in his room, and he opened his eyes very slowly. He had never been so exhausted or in so much pain in his life, and he had never been so scared either. But he had one last thing he had to do, and it would be all over after that.

Sara sat down in the chair she had just vacated minutes before, situating Amy onto her lap.

"Daddy?" Amy spoke very quietly, "Daddy, are you awake?"

Erich slowly turned his head to face his daughter. "I am, Doo. And I am so happy to see you."

Amy's smile grew when she heard her father use her favorite nickname for her. It was sort for Doodlebug, something he had called her since the first time he held her. "Are you hurt, Daddy?"

He sighed lightly, not wanting to cause anymore pain, and Sara tightened her arms around the little girl in her lap. "I am hurt, very much, honey." He shifted slightly, away from the girls next to the bed. Addressing Sara, he asked, "Can you set her on the bed?"

She didn't trust her voice, so she just nodded, and whispered lightly in Amy's ear. "Be very careful, okay?" When she nodded in return, Sara helped her kneel on the bed next to her father, and once she was sure the child was safe, she leaned back into the chair.

Erich pulled his daughter to her in a light hug, his fingers stroking through her soft brown waves. When she pulled away to look at him, he began to speak quietly. "Doo, I have something to tell you, and you need to listen, okay?"

Amy nodded, and he continued, "What did Grandma tell you about Mommy?"

"That she went up to heaven to be with the angels." She curled up into his side, wiping a tear that fell down her cheek, and he squeezed her tighter.

"That's right, Amy, and in a little while I'm going to go be with Mommy."

"What about me, Daddy? I wanna go and be with you and Mommy."

"You can't. You're going to stay here, with Aunt Sara, and grow up to be a big girl."

Amy sat up and looked to Sara, who was ignoring the tears falling down her face. "I'm going to live with you, Aunt Sara?"

Sara just nodded, and Amy turned back to her father.

"Yes, you are going to go live with Aunt Sara, in Las Vegas with her. She's gong to take good care of you, honey, and you need to help take care of her. Okay?"

Amy nodded, also ignoring the tears falling from her eyes.

Erich pulled her back into a hug, and for a few minutes the only noise in the room was made by the machines he was hooked up to, and the light sobs coming from his side. Sara watched silently, taking deep breaths to prevent herself from breaking down.

The monotony was broken by a small voice, "Daddy, I don't want you to go."

Erich, ignoring the pain that it took to lift Amy up higher so that he could see her, finally broke down and said between sobs, "I don't want to leave either, Doo. But I have too." The two of them sobbed, until Erich took a deep, painful breath. "Remember what I said, okay? I love you, Doo, so much."

Sara tried as she might to muffle her sobs, but it was no use as the next few moments passed.

"I love you too, Daddy."

Erich closed his eyes, and the heart monitor steadied out to a shrill tone.


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N: Okay, I have to apologize for the ridiculous delay in getting this chapter out. Real life just got so hectic, then during my Spring Break I was just too relaxed to even think about touching my computer for any other reason that to read or talk to friends, and then real life got hectic again. And it's been during this delay that I remembered why I would never write a WIP again. But I will finish this…I promise! Big thanks to AmbientFlames for bugging the hell out of me to write more, and for reading this over before I posted**.

She sat in a chair, looking as if she had no clue what was going on around her. Amy was sitting in her lap, taking in the number of people in the room, still not completely understanding why she was there. Sara's face showed no emotion, even as her brother and sister in law's friends and acquaintances came to her to express their condolences. She would lift her head to look at them, offer a waning smile, perhaps a soft thank you, and then look back to the young child in her lap. She had never expected to be in this situation, and she definitely was not ready to handle it yet.

Halfway through the wake, she felt the hairs on the back of her neck stand. At first she ignored the feeling, cursing her body for playing tricks on her. But then, the familiar shiver she felt whenever he was near ran through her body, causing her to tense up a bit. She began looking around the room discretely, and a large smile formed on her face when she spotted him leaning on the wall by the door. Quickly, she maneuvered Amy onto her hip and stood up, weaving in and out of groups of people until she was standing in front of him.

Hefting Amy higher on her hip, she asked, slightly confused, "What are you doing here?"

He took a moment to observe her before answering. She looked absolutely exhausted, and although her face betrayed her pain, he could see a flicker of hope deep within her eyes. "The boys and Catherine threatened to kill me if I didn't come out here to be with you."

Her eyes widened slightly at his choice of words, but she quickly replaced her surprise with a bright smile, despite the activity around her. "And you actually took the threat to heart?"

He smirked, "They do know how to hide a body."

Truth be told, the second Sara called and said that both her brother and his wife had passed away, he wanted to drop everything he was doing and drive out to San Francisco to be with her. But he was leery of leaving the lab in its current state of affairs. If he left, only Greg and Sofia would be around to cover graveyard. Catherine and he were still not on the greatest terms, so he felt uncomfortable asking her for the help of Warrick and Nick. However, the news spread through the lab quickly, and at the beginning of his next shift, Catherine walked into his office, flanked by the two guys, and told him that they were willing to cover grave for a few shifts so someone could go be out with Sara. He was on the first flight out of Vegas the next morning.

A few moments of silence passed as Sara digested what Grissom had just told her. "Catherine was in on it too?"

"Sara…" he warned softly.

"Never mind, forget I said anything. That's the last thing I need to be thinking about." It was at this point in time that Amy buried her head into Sara's neck. She broke her gaze with Grissom to lean back to look at the girl in her arms. "Amy, honey?" Brown eyes locked with hers and Sara smiled. She looked back to Grissom, and began the introductions, "This is my niece, Amy. Amy, say hi to Grissom."

"It's very nice to meet you, Amy."

He was the first person all day that Amy did not shy away from. She smiled a little smile, whispered something resembling a "hi," and just stared at him. She figured he was okay to like, because he had finally made Aunt Sara smile, which she hadn't done since she first showed up at the hospital.

Grissom still recognized a little unease in the young child's eyes, so he decided to charm her a bit. "You know something, Amy? You look exactly like your Aunt here, very beautiful."

Amy's smile grew at the compliment, and he recognized it immediately. Looking back to Sara's face, he found the original owner of that smile, and her cheeks were lightly tinged in pink. Before either one of the girls could say anything in response, Sara felt a light tap on her shoulder. She turned to see Angie standing right behind her.

"I thought you could use a little rest from the little bug. You want me to take her for a little while?" Angie asked, all the while her eyes darting between Sara and Grissom.

Sara knew what she was getting at, and accepted the offer, but not before introducing her to Grissom. "Angie, this is my, uh, my friend, Gil Grissom. Griss, this is Julie's mother, Angie. She was basically my second mother growing up."

Blushing slightly at the exaggeration, Angie reached forward to grasp Grissom's hand. Once the introductions were complete, Angie collected Amy into her arms and walked toward a group of older women, each of whom gushed over the little girl.

Sara watched them walk away for a few moments, and then turned back to Grissom. Their eyes locked, and all of a sudden she felt like she could collapse. She had been running on pure adrenaline for the past two days, getting all of the arrangements together, and with Grissom standing in front of her, she felt drained.

He noticed her change in demeanor and before she could fall, he pulled her into his arms. She tensed for a few moments, and then relaxed. Within minutes she was comfortable enough to let herself feel the pain for the first time since leaving the hospital, and she began to sob into his shoulder. All he could do was hold her tighter, and stroke her hair softly, murmuring comforting words into her ear. And, there in the deep recesses of his mind, he couldn't help but think how perfectly she fit against his body.

After a few minutes, he noticed that her shoulders had stopped shaking violently, and her breathing had begun to deepen as she calmed down. She attempted to pull back, her eyes closed, but his arms prevented her from going far. She opened her eyes and realized that her lips were mere centimeters from his jaw line. Her eyes shot to his, and he was staring intently at her. They could both see the conflicting emotions the other was feeling, and neither wanting to break the eye contact.

It was Sara who moved first, her eyelids dropping slowly as she leaned forward and just barely brushed her lips across his jaw. She whispered, "Thank you," before pulling back, forcing him to drop his arms. They stood only about a foot apart, and kept up their search in the other's eyes, until Grissom's gaze darted behind Sara.

Angie was making her way back toward the couple, carrying a very sleepy Amy. "Sara, I think you should take her home now. She needs some sleep before tomorrow."

Sara just nodded as she collected the little girl from Angie. "Come on, Do. Let's go home." Amy wrapped her arms tightly around Sara's neck, and rested her head on her shoulder. Sara turned to Grissom. "Where are you staying?"

"I came right here once I got into town, so I was planning on getting a hotel after I saw you."

Sara shook her head, "No, follow me. You can stay with us. There's plenty of room."

"Sara, I…" he began to protest, until he was interrupted.

"Please, Griss."

He could see at that moment that she wasn't offering for his benefit. She needed him with her. And he wasn't going to deny her that. "Sure. Let's go." He placed a hand lightly on her back as he guided her and Amy outside, and away from the sorrow and pity that lingered in the faces of every person they passed.


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N: Sorry again about the delay in updating….real life is really hectic lately. Enjoy!**

Grissom pulled his rental car into the driveway as Sara was getting out of her own, and moving towards the rear driver's side door to help Amy out. Sara began digging through her purse as Grissom got out of his car, searching for the keys to her brother's house. She finally found them, and handed them to him. Looking down at the sleeping child, he understood, and made his way up the walkway to the front door.

Moments later, Sara entered the house carrying a half sleeping Amy. "I'm going to go put her down. I'll be right back." Grissom watched as she walked down the hallway to the little girl's room. The sight of Sara caring for Amy struck him as overtly maternal, and the questions that had been forming in his mind during the drive were making themselves known again.

Sara had never mentioned her brother having a daughter, which wasn't terribly surprising given the amount of information he did know about Sara. And now, her niece had no parents. Grissom considered the possibilities, the most obvious being that Sara would become Amy's legal guardian, no matter how much it would change her life. He thought about any other scenarios, but quickly discounted them. Amy would not be put into the system, not if Sara had any say in the matter, especially not after her own childhood. Angie obviously loved her granddaughter, but Grissom could see the fatigue behind the woman's bright eyes, and knew that she would never be able to handle caring for a three year old.

Grissom was startled out of his thoughts by Sara returning to the living room and collapsing on the couch. He walked further into the room, and sat at the other end of the couch, twisting his body slightly to look at her.

She took a moment to study him. She expected him to be nervous, sitting so close to her in a non-work environment, but he outwardly looked calm. She also noted that he looked a bit curious, and realized that there were a lot of unanswered questions she needed to answer.

However, they could wait just a few more minutes. She scooted closer to him on the couch, her eyes cast down, and reached out to touch his hand lightly. "I just want to thank you for being here. It's nice to have someone else here, to…uh…distract me from the memories."

He turned the hand that she was touching, and grasped her own with his. "I told you I would be here anytime you needed me." He pulled her hand gently toward him, tenderly easing her closer toward him until she was wrapped up in his arms.

They stayed like that for a few silent minutes, until she pulled back with a small smile on her face. She reached up and placed her hand on his cheek, stroking his beard ever so lightly. He could barely hear her as she whispered, "Thank you."

Once she recognized the intense intimacy of the moment, she stood slowly, and made her way into the kitchen. "Do you want something to drink?"

Grissom was still trying to switch gears, and looked at her confused. "What?"

"I said, do you want anything to drink?"

"Uh, yeah, some water?"

Sara busied herself with getting the glasses and pulling the pitcher out of the fridge, as Grissom got up from the couch and sat down at the small breakfast nook. His curiosity was getting the better of him, so he just asked the question that had been bothering him all night, "What's going to happen with Amy?"

She had just finished pouring the second glass, put the pitcher back in the fridge and sat across from him before she told him. "In the next couple of days, I have to sign the paperwork that will make me her legal guardian."

Despite knowing that was the most likely course of action, Grissom eyebrows rose slightly. But then he realized how detached she had sounded, and he wondered if it had actually sunk in yet. "How do you feel about that?"

She looked up from the countertop, straight into his eyes. "Honestly? I haven't even thought about it since Erich told me. But I really have no choice in the matter now; I already gave him my word that I would take care of her."

"Well, it's for the best right?"

"Of course, the only other conceivable option that I would allow would be for her to live with Angie, but there is no way that she could care for her the way that I could. And my only niece is not going to a foster home, no way, no how."

"I didn't think you would allow that to happen." He sighed, and reached across to touch her hand that was wrapped around her glass. "I wasn't only talking about it being the best for her, but for you too."

She pulled her hand backwards quickly. "How is the fact that I have to care for my niece because her parents were killed by a drunk driver the best for me?" She stood up and began pacing as she listed off reasons. "My life has been turned upside down in a matter of days, Grissom. First, my brother and sister-in-law are gone, leaving me to take of a child. A child! Me! I am the last person that should be responsible for another life, and it's not like I can really turn to anyone for help because everyone I know either had a shitty childhood, or are having trouble raising their own kids."

He just let her go, knowing that she needed to blow off some steam before he could get a word in edgewise. But when she finally stopped talking, he stood and stepped right in front of her, grabbing her shoulders lightly, and stopping her frantic pacing.

She couldn't look up at him, ashamed that she has just spent the past moments thinking only about how this affected her and nothing about how this was going to affect the child sleeping on the other side of the house. It wasn't until he softly spoke her name that she managed a glance to his face.

"I know that this is going to be hard on you, and that you don't know how you're going to handle this, but think of it this way: What would you do if your brother died and he didn't have a daughter?"

Puzzled, she stumbled her way through an answer, "I guess I would go home. And work, lots of overtime to forget about him, but that can't happen now."

He gently reached down and lifted her face more towards him. "Exactly. You would go home and bottle up every emotion you were feeling, just like you have with everything else traumatic in your life, and it would eat away at you. With Amy around, you know that you can't work to forget the feelings. You'll have to deal with them every time that you look at her, every time that you think about her. And because you're facing it head on, eventually the pain you're feeling now will go away. It will, Sara, and you'll be a much stronger person because of it."

She lowered her eyes from his, and he could tell that she was thinking over everything that he had said. Finally, she whispered, "I never thought about it like that."

He pulled her into a hug when he saw that she had begun crying. "I know that you hadn't, it's just that this is the one time in your life that you can't deal with trauma the way that you always have, and you don't know what to do."

He felt her tremble lightly on his shoulder, and worried that she was sobbing again, he pulled back a little to see her face. He was surprised to see her giggling through her tears.

"When did you become a psychologist?"

He chuckled lightly at her comment, and they pulled apart reluctantly. As Sara went to put the glasses in the sink, she yawned, and Grissom happened to take notice.

"Why don't you go to bed?"

"You know I don't sleep well when I'm stressed."

"I know, but you should at least try." Noticing her reluctance, he nodded his head toward the bedroom, "Come on, you need some sleep before tomorrow."

She gave him a mock glare, but followed anyway. They stopped in front of the guest bedroom door, and Sara just realized that she had been sleeping there, leaving Grissom with no where but her brother's room or the couch. "Uh, Griss? You can have this room, I'll take…"

He interrupted her by placing a hand lightly over her mouth. "No, I'll take the couch. It's no problem. You need the bed more than I do."

She nodded, knowing she was never going to win an argument with him tonight. She went to turn the knob, but turned back to ask him a question. "Will you stay with me for a while. Just to talk?"

"Sure." They entered the room, and Sara gathered her pajamas to change into. Once she came back from the bathroom, he had made himself comfortable on the queen-sized bed. She pulled back the covers and crawled between the sheets, fluffing the pillows.

As he watched her, he realized that he wanted to do this every night for the rest of his life. To be able to watch her do such mundane things as getting ready for bed would make him a happy man, but he also knew that this was not the time to even begin to think about starting a relationship with her.

After a few moments of silence he asked, "So what did you want to talk about?"

She just shrugged.

He looked thoughtful for a moment. "Would you mind telling me about your brother? I don't know anything about him except that he got grounded for having weed under his bed."

Sara smiled at the two memories that filled her mind at the moment; one of her brother chasing her, so angry that he had just gotten grounded and the other of her sitting in the locker room after closing Melissa's case.

"He was five years older than me, and that was always his excuse for protecting me. All my life he acted as if it were his job to protect me, and when I was little, I hated it. But then, when things began to change for the worse, I realized that it was nice to have an older brother. When my dad was killed, and I was put in foster care, he was eighteen and just went off on his own instead of being put into the system. But even though there was no way he could take care of himself and his thirteen year old sister at the time, he still visited me all the time, to make sure that I was alright. I looked forward to his visits all the time, and once he got back together with Julie, both of them would visit, making me even more excited."

"How did he and Julie meet?"

"They've been friends since elementary school, and were a couple practically from the age of fourteen. Like I said earlier, Angie was like a second mother just because Erich and I spent so much time over there to get away from the chaos that was our house. At some point when they were in high school, though, Angie's husband died of a heart attack, and they moved away. Then everything happened in our family, and they lost touch. They ran into each other when Erich was twenty five, and have been together since. They got married twelve years ago."

"They were married for nine years before having Amy?"

"Yeah, Amy was a miracle for them. They had been trying to have a baby for years, and Julie had been through two very rough miscarriages in the second trimester. They had almost given up hope when Amy was conceived, and even through the pregnancy, she was extra careful and wary of losing her. But she made it, and Amy was probably the best thing to ever happen to them. It gave Erich the one thing he had always dreamed of."

"What's that?" He noticed that her eyes were beginning to droop, and she would be asleep soon.

"A happy family." She said drowsily as she closed her eyes, and snuggled closer into the pillow.

He reached over and brushed a strand of hair from her face, speaking softly, "Good night, Sara." As he stood to move into the living room he turned back when he heard her voice call out his name sleepily. "What is it?"

"Can you sleep in here…with me?"

He smiled lightly at her request, and without an answer, crawled between the sheets, fully clothed. He rolled over onto his side to face her and wrapped his arms around her, relishing the thought of actually being able to comfort her the way he had wanted to for years. She was asleep within minutes, and after watching her breaths even out, he whispered lightly in her ear, "All you ever have to do is ask, Sara, and I'll be right here." Settling into his pillow, he closed his eyes and he found sleep just as quickly as she had.


	6. Chapter 6

**A/N: I apologize immensely for the ridiculously long delay in getting this chapter out. I have been plagued with a horrible bout of writer's block, and this chapter was just so hard to write simply because it was so sad. And since I've been in this ridiculously good mood the past few weeks, I haven't been able to get past that and write this. A big thanks to AmbientFlames for just bugging me constantly about it. Again I apologize, and I hope you enjoy!**

He had the distinct feeling he was being watched. Grissom opened his eyes slowly, letting them readjust to the light within the bedroom. Glancing down, he quickly ruled out Sara as the culprit, as she was still sleeping, exactly the way she had been all night. He smiled, and pulled her a little bit closer. She, in turn, snuggled her face further into his chest and sighed lightly. Forgetting momentarily about being watched, he closed his eyes, and buried his face into her hair, placing a small kiss on the top of her head.

He heard the shuffling of feet at the end of the bed. Opening his eyes, he saw Amy tiptoeing towards the door. Releasing his hold on Sara, he rolled slowly to face the doorway. He whispered softly, "Amy?"

She turned at the sound of her name being called, looking shyly to the floor, ashamed she had been caught in the room.

Grissom carefully extracted himself from around Sara, and as she rolled over in her sleep, he sat up facing the doorway. "Is everything okay?"

Amy shook her head, blond curls going every which way. Her eyes were locked together with Grissom's, but she remained silent.

Giving her a small smile, he motioned for her to come over to the bed. She hesitated for a moment, but soon walked slowly to his side of the bed.

"What's wrong?"

She lowered her eyes back to the floor, and spoke very quietly, "I wanted to lie down with Aunt Sara, like I did yesterday, but…"

"But I'm in your way, aren't I?"

She just nodded her head.

Grissom leaned over and lifted her chin gently, "How about this? I'll go make some breakfast for us, and you can have my spot on the bed. Sound good to you?"

If the smile on her face was any indication, the plan sounded fine to her. She moved closer to the bed and attempted to get up on the bed. After a couple failed attempts, Grissom leaned over and helped pull her up and over him, placing her in between him and Sara. She snuggled into the pillows and blankets, making herself comfortable, as Grissom got out of the bed. He helped tuck the blankets up around her chin, and turned to exit the room, when her small voice called out to him.

"Thank you, Griss."

He smiled at the fact that she had already adopted the same nickname that Sara used the day before as they were leaving the funeral home. "You're very welcome, Amy."

He took one last glance at the two girls in the bed, as Amy nestled into Sara's back. Turning to leave the room, he knew that despite everything, the two of them would always have each other.

---------------------------------------------------

All she could think about was how it wasn't supposed to be sunny out today. Amy was sitting in Sara's lap, her blond head leaning against her chest, her eyes closed. Grissom sat next to them, his hand gently holding Sara's. They were silent as the pastor spoke about the journey that Erich and Julie had embarked on in the afterlife. And all Sara wanted was for the sky to darken, and it to start pouring down rain.

She didn't remember placing Amy into Angie's lap, nor standing and making her way to the front of the small crowd. But she could feel the tears already welling up in her eyes, and she dreaded doing what she felt she had to do next. Closing her eyes tightly, she willed the tears away, so that she would appear as the strong person she wanted to be. After a deep breath, she opened her eyes and faced everyone that had come to pay their last respects to her brother and his wife.

"Right now, all I can think about is how much Erich would have loved a day like today. I feel like I've forgotten everything I wanted to say, and all I can picture is him smiling, standing on some rocks by the ocean, holding Julie's hand as they watch Amy play among the waves. Eric and Julie never had it easy, but someone who just met them off the street would never know the troubles that they endured just to get where they were. They were two of the strongest people I have ever met, and, well, I can easily say that I needed that strength for the majority of my life. Erich and I didn't come from the best of backgrounds, and when he was eighteen, he was forced to look after me as best as he could while in I was in foster home after foster home. And not once did he ever complain. He would tell me to work hard in school so that I could get out and do something with my life, so that I wouldn't turn into him, barely making his living working as a cashier. He was there, every step of the way, even after he married Julie, and I graduated college. He was always there to lend a listening ear, no matter how far away I was, no matter what problem I had."

"I remember being a little girl and playing with Erich and Julie, knowing that one day they would grow up and get married and lead a wonderful life. And I know now, that while their life wasn't easy, they thought it was wonderful. They had each other, and gave each other exactly what the other wanted and needed. Julie gave Erich the best gift in the world when she gave birth to Amy; she gave him a family, the happy family that he had always wanted for himself. A few days ago, all I could think about was how that dream had been hopelessly shattered. But now, I've realized that it doesn't have to be that way. Julie and Erich will always be a part of me, of everyone here. They left me their most precious gift, their beautiful little girl, and I can only hope that we can keep this family happy and together as long as possible. I know they'll be watching over us, and knowing that makes me feel stronger about getting through today, and tomorrow, and every other day past that."

Sara walked back to her chair with tears running down her face, but she was smiling through them at Amy sitting in Angie's lap. When she reached them, Amy lifted her arms, and Sara lifted her into a hug, whispering in her ear that she loved her very much.

The crowd had begun to disperse before Sara loosened her grip on Amy. As she set the little girl back down on the grass, she felt Grissom's hand on her arm. No words were spoken between them as he pulled her into a hug; Amy was still clinging to her aunt's left leg. When he released her, there were a few people that wanted to speak with Sara and Angie, so he moved away from the crowd.

A few minutes later, when most of the people had begun to walk away from the gravesite, Sara searched around for Grissom. She found him standing under a maple tree a few feet away. She picked up Amy and the two of them began to walk over to him. However, another person caught Sara's attention before she could completely reach him. She stopped dead in her tracks, and tightened her grip on Amy.

Her mother was standing next to her brother's coffin, tears running down her face, and her right hand resting on the polished wood.


End file.
